NFL Power Rankings: Week 2 From A Minnesotan's Perspective

The NFL season is exactly 1/16th complete for all 32 teams, so of course it's time to make over-reactive assumptions about which teams are the best! We didn't have preseason power rankings here at SB Nation Minnesota--because that would be just silly--but with one game in the books, we're willing to give it a shot. Here's our first weekly edition of the NFL power rankings:

1. 49ers (1-0): This is a Minnesota site. Any time can you go into Lambeau and beat up on Green Bay like San Francisco did on Sunday, you get the top overall ranking. The Niners just look like a great football team from the moment they get off the bus.
2. Ravens (1-0): It might just be the Year of the Unibrow. After Anthony Davis won an NCAA title and gold medal for Team USA in basketball, Joe Flacco certainly looks poised to make The Leap into the upper echelon of NFL quarterbacks. That's bad news for the rest of the AFC.
3. Patriots (1-0): The Pats might finally have a D to go with their plethora of offensive weapons.
4. Texans (1-0): Houston took care of business and Hard Knocked Miami all over the field. Now let's see how they perform against a real team.
5. Falcons (1-0): Atlanta finally figured out that tossing to Roddy White, Julio Jones, and Tony Gonzalez more often is probably a better idea than slamming Michael Turner into the line of scrimmage 30 times a game. Big road win for a team that has been historically shaky away from home.
6. Broncos (1-0): Don't expect 2006 Peyton Manning to show up any time soon, but 2012 Peyton Manning might be enough to propel Denver into contention.
7. Packers (0-1): Bold prediction alert! The Packers probably won't go 15-1 again this year.
8. Bears (1-0): Solid win against a bad team; we'll learn a lot more about them on Thursday night.
9. Giants (0-1): Don't worry. The G-Men are just following their classic Super Bowl formula: start poorly, nearly get Tom Coughlin fired halfway through the year, sneak into the playoffs, and then run the table. Or maybe their secondary is just too beat up to compete right now.
10. Cowboys (1-0): We kept waiting for Dallas to piss away their lead late in the game last Wednesday; they didn't. Was it a fluke or are Tony Romo and company finally growing up?
11. Chargers (1-0): How weird was it to see a game where San Diego's opponent kept screwing up on special teams? Still lots of work to do for the Bolts, but a divisional road win is always a good start.
12. Lions (1-0): It wasn't pretty, but Matthew Stafford to Calvin Johnson is still pretty much unstoppable. Overcoming a -3 turnover margin isn't easy no matter who your opponent is.
13. Steelers (0-1): Lots of questions for Pittsburgh. As long as the offensive line doesn't get Ben Roethlisberger killed they'll still be competitive.
14. Eagles (1-0): That win in Cleveland impressed exactly nobody. Was it playing down to their level of competition or is Philly just not that good?
15. Redskins (1-0): Robert Griffin III. That is all.
16. Buccaneers (1-0): Held Carolina to 10 yards rushing. The offense sputtered at times, but they could be a tough out all year.
17. Jets (1-0): More proof that the preseason means absolutely nothing.
18. Saints (0-1): Maybe Washington is really good. Maybe New Orleans' porous defense can't stop anybody. We think it's probably somewhere in the middle.
19. Vikings (1-0): Sure, the Vikes eked by a bad team at home by the skin of their teeth. But they lost every single one of those games last year. Their strong second half coupled with Adrian Peterson's surprising performance are reasons for hope.
20. Cardinals (1-0): GOOD GOD THAT'S KEVIN KOLB'S MUSIC! Their defense is legit. If they can get non-terrible quarterback play, they could surprise people.
21. Bengals (0-1): It could be that Cincy just ran into a buzzsaw in Baltimore to open the season, but that offense looks like it might struggle to score points. It's A.J. Green or...?
22. Chiefs (0-1): Wasn't their defense supposed to be better with everyone returning from injury?
23. Panthers (0-1): It was just one game on the road against a divisional opponent that knows them well. No need for "OMG CAM NEWTON SOPHOMORE SLUMP!!!" just yet, but it sure looked like they missed Jonathan Stewart in Tampa.
24. Seahawks (0-1): Russell Wilson didn't really play all that bad in his debut. Their biggest problem? The offensive line gave Wilson zero time and opened zero holes for Marshawn Lynch.
25. Rams (0-1): St. Louis looked feisty before dropping a winnable game in Detroit. Jeff Fisher will have them playing better, but obviously they still need to learn how to finish.
26. Titans (0-1): There needs to be a new fantasy football support group called "I Can't Believe I Got Suckered Into Drafting Chris Johnson Again". Members can watch Titans games and scream at the television together while CJ0K runs for 1.3 yards per carry.
27. Bills (0-1): That sound you just heard was the Bills' bandwagon careening off a cliff and exploding at the bottom of a canyon. Or maybe it was just another crucial member of their team suffering an injury.
28. Jaguars (0-1): Blaine Gabbert looks better, but this team still isn't sniffing the playoffs as it's currently composed.
29. Raiders (0-1): Nobody misses the long snapper until he's gone.
30. Colts (0-1): Just not that much talent surrounding Andrew Luck right now.
31. Browns (0-1): Brandon Weeden's rating in his NFL debut: 5.1. The quarterback rating you get if you throw every pass directly into the ground (aka "McNabbing"): 39.6.
32. Dolphins (0-1): Oof. This team is just bad.