Have you ever sat down to read your favorite newspaper's sports section, sports themed magazine, or perhaps a fun little website (such as this one), and thought to yourself, "There is no way this guy ever played the game?" The vast majority of the time, you are likely correct, but the writer still has the authority on the subject after covering the game for years. Still, it would be wonderful if those blowhards could just suit up and take some licks, right?
The Minnesota Swarm have heard you, and they are offering up the Twin Cities media covering the team on a silver platter. On April 14th, the Swarm will host members of the media as the team attempts to train those in the press box, with their fancy five dollar words and criticisms, on how the game actually looks at
full half one-eighth speed.
There will be Swarm players and coaches present to give instruction, which, of course, will likely be forgotten as quickly as it is taught. There will be a Lacrosse 101 class for the media types, then a scrimmage, and finally a skills contest. What all of this amounts to, is a chance for the media to come down on the field, put a stick in their hands, and learn the game from the best in the world.
What it will actually look like is a completely different story.
"We're looking forward to giving local media members the opportunity to experience box lacrosse firsthand with Swarm players and coaches," said John Arlotta, Owner and President for the Minnesota Swarm. "We feel that this event will provide those in attendance with a better understanding of the fastest growing sport in America."
Mr. Arlotta is a good man. He runs a first class operation along with his son, Andy. As a member of the media about to embark on a mission from which my pride may never recover, I can't help but wonder if the tandem in charge will be standing on the bench laughing the entire time.
Guess I'll just have to put a sock trick past Evan Kirk and quiet the critics. For the record, I have no representation, John, so just have the contract drawn up and ready to go.